birthcharts:

(via letsboldlygomotherfuckers)

m1tos1s:

the only reason i still have depression is because i can’t take my brain out of my skull and blow on it like a ds cartridge

(via letsboldlygomotherfuckers)

aphony-cree:

i-find-the-beauty-in-chaos:

osointricate:

How about we vote in a law that puts a cap on how long a government shut down can happen… say 20 days… before the president has to agree to a budget solution or else the 21st day congress begins the process of impreachment because civilian jobs and salaries and livelihoods are not a bargaining tool for the president to abuse is order to get their way

If you aren’t serving the people then you aren’t doing the job of the presidency and you need to be replaced

AMEN

Also keep in mind that there have been 2 House-passed packages that would have fully re-opened the federal government but Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConell blocked them both

800,000 government employees are without paychecks because 2 republican millionaires are blocking all efforts to get them back to work

(via letsboldlygomotherfuckers)

silentwalrus1:

silentwalrus1:

i had a thought today like man, my ancestors would probably not approve very much of me being such an extravagant glutton, but then i was like wtf are u kidding. those dumbasses didn’t live on a fuckin potato ass diet for no minimalism. they didn’t do what they did, whatever the fuck it was, for me NOT to fucking eat my bodyweight in sashimi!!! they would be fucking ecstatic to see me making the most of my opportunities for plenty. they would be fucking cheering me on. every lice-covered cossack and illiterate serf and three-toothed yak herder in my lineage is with me in this restaurant, and they are going absolutely apeshit watching me try to fit an entire samosa in my mouth

i love this idea that the ancestors are following modern people around like a rappers yes-man as we eat food #‘fucking superb you funky little descendant’

me, standing in front of the burger king counter like the blithering hunger gibbon i am: i’ll have… uhhh… double whopper with fries. thank you. large please

the 500 mongolian tatar and polish jew ghosts behind me: [ERUPT INTO WILD SCREAMING AND HIGH FIVES] 

(via ironraths)

swordlesbianism:

swordlesbianism:

swordlesbianism:

Every other straight man ever singing about a woman: wow baby you’re so sexy I love you because your body is sexy

Hozier, an intellectual and lesbian ally: I am a bird of prey and you are a sharp spike upon which I impale small rodents

Straight man #2505: we met at the club she was really hot

Forest lad himself: it was as my baby churned up the mud that she found me there, buried and alone

Fucking eduardo sheerman or whomever: I just want to errr kiss you babe

Andrew Hozier Byrnes: I want nothing more than for us to lay in a field together until we decompose and are eaten by foxes

(via notrea)

somberspectraltrees:

(via witchofobsession)